I’m pissed. TWICE I have composed this post and TWICE it hasn’t worked for whatever reason. Currently Blogger sucks ass. Sorry but it does. I’ll apologize later. I’m typing this in word because I don’t want to have to come up with it for yet a FOURTH time.

Whatever…here’s the story:

Last night the husband and I rented “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.” Now anyone who knows me will tell you that I hate Jim Carrey with the burning fire of a thousand STDs. His whole over the top face contortionist always looking constipated or in the process of relieving said constipation in a somewhat explosive manner just doesn’t do it for me. But whatever, not the point, this isn’t a movie review. But for those of you who are into that sort of thing, I thought it was a really good movie.

But more than that, it got me thinking. Would I want to do the same sort of thing and erase a past relationship or mistake or other painful memory so that I’d never have to think of it again? My first instinct was HELL YES I would. And I’ve got relationships, memories, and other various transgressions in spades people. Far too numerous to mention here, maybe another day. But while at the time, they all sucked, they made me who I am today. And while this hasn’t always been the case, I really like who I am. I’ve got a damn good life and part of that is due to what I’ve learned about being a human being.

That’s where we become who we are, in our darkest moments. You get strength from the hard times. Sure, there was that one time in high school (ah…high school) where I drank waaaaaaay too much at a party, acted like an ass, got sick, apparently fell down some stairs at some point and showed up at school on Monday on CRUTCHES PEOPLE. I wanted to literally DIE of humiliation. It was awful. But I learned the consequences of being a 17 year old drunken jackass. And never again was I a 17 year old drunken jackass. You know…I went away to school the next year and I was an 18 and 19 year old drunken jackass but the crutches, now THOSE were a one time thing. So I don’t even think I would erase that, my single most embarrassing moment ever. (Walking into class on Monday, not the drunken escapade that I don’t remember anyway).

I mean, if we don’t learn from our mistakes and our bad relationships then how do we ever grow up? Our past is our past, sure, but it makes our future. If it didn’t exist, we’d just repeat mistakes over and over and if we don’t learn from our past, aren’t we destined to keep repeating it and never get to our futures? That’s really depressing if you ask me.

Also, Kate Winslet’s tangerine hair kicked ass.