Archive for the 'RPS Friday' Category

Published by PaintingChef on 08 Sep 2006

A desperate attempt to remove this grey cloud of sadness.

I give up. Dead babies. Dead dogs. Things have been all bleak and depressing here at the funny farm recently and quite frankly, I’m about to disappear under a big black cloud unless I do something about this like…yesterday. So how about I just show you some pictures? Can we all agree on that?

Excellent.

First up? Me and Betsy. On the beach. Because if there is one thing I can count on Betsy to ALWAYS do, its put a big goofy smile on my face.

Me and Betsy

This is my grandfather. We call him Pop-Pop and he’s kind of hysterical but always just a little grumpy which makes him just about one of the cutest grandfathers in the world. And if you tell him I said that I’ll cut you. Also? He clams. There was much discussion as to what the proper terminology for clamming was. Do you fetch them? Catch them? Fish them? Pluck them? No consensus was reached. The only thing we could agree on was that Pop-Pop kicked all of our asses in whatever the right term for it was.

Clamming.

Patrick and Matt try and soak up all the knowledge they can…

Learning from the Master

This picture makes me a little weepy (so I guess I just shot the whole pictures that make me smile out the damn window) as I’m quite certain that there is an almost identical picture of Daddy and Maddie floating around out there… Maddie was quite the clammer. She would wade out with Daddy and Pop-Pop and carry clams to the bucket. Belle just splashed around like a fool. I was so proud…

Man and Beast

Look. Its a little boat named just for me. Apparently nobody got the memo that I am sorely inept when it comes to driving boats and I regret that this one’s miniature status will not allow for my mandatory crew of 6 plus one cabana boy whose sole job consists of providing me with a steady stream of frozen rum drinks while telling me how shockingly gorgeous I am.

The Little Princess

This made me giggle…

Don't Piss Off the Fairies

And sometimes Patrick takes pictures of the beautiful scenery he encounters… LOOK! Its man-scenery!

Cobra

Someone on the Jersey Turnpike was touched by his noodly appendage…

Touched by his noodley appendage...

I love the random things you see on road trips…

Drunk Chicken

Eat More Bananas!

Shortly after sighting the “Eat More Bananas!” truck that became my respone to every single question Patrick asked me. You have no idea the miracle you have witnessed that I am still married. Or alive.

So…okay…I’m grinning at least a little.

Published by PaintingChef on 21 Jul 2006

Dinnertime at the OK Corral. . .

I have a feeling that this could potentially erupt into quite the violent showdown…

Dinnertime

And that while the aftermath APPEARS to be harmless, perhaps Belle is in grave danger…

Aftermath

Also I’m thinking that perhaps I REALLY need to get a damn life already. Fucking ovaries.

Published by PaintingChef on 14 Jul 2006

What the world needs now, is dog, wet dog.

As you all know, in the absence of any real, live, two legged children, Patrick and I are kind of guilty of ridiculously spoiling our pets. Since today is Friday and I generally slap a bunch of pictures up here and force you to look at them all weekend and sometimes on Mondays too when I am too lazy to generate anything creative and new for your reading pleasure and since I am, at the moment you are reading this, sunning myself on the beach and probably well on my way to a mid-morning drunk, I’ll follow suit and show you pictures (and VIDEO!) of Belle swimming in the lake.

Its the WET DOG!

Belle

And the attack of the MASSIVE TONGUE!

Attack of the TONGUE!!!

Followed by MORE! Wet dog!

Belle again...

Finally, for your viewing pleasure, I present a full minute of Belle swimming in the lake chasing a toy that I can only describe as a tampon made out of tennis balls, Patrick’s engineering prowess that you must look closely to see as it involves a detachable, submerged dog ramp, his blindingly white left shoulder and…as a special bonus…my whiny hillbilly voice. Also? Take some Dramamine because damn. I suck at this whole video thing.

Now pass me another margarita cabana boy…


Video Hosting – Upload Video – Video Sharing

Published by PaintingChef on 16 Jun 2006

Its all about ME, ME, ME!!

Hey. Remember when I used to slap a bunch of pictures up here on a Friday and call it a Random Picture Story? Let’s look into doing that again, shall we?

Last night I was venturing into an area of preparation for the in-laws coming to town that could only be described as “multi-tasking” as I was cleaning, doing laundry, talking to my mother on the phone, and exploring my options in homemade guest-bedroom in-law eating booby-traps. And LOOK! Is clean house!

Living room, clean!

Living Room

Kitchen…okay, not clean but will be clean by this afternoon!

Kitchen...will eventually be clean...maybe

Dining room, clean!

Dining Room

Bedroom…also not clean but can just close door…

Bedroom

And then I was dusting picture frames and decided to show you how cute and happy we are. As I think everyone needs a good solid upchuck on Friday mornings…

This was my mother’s graphic design prowess. She thought she was quite clever. Patrick is all ring-bearerish and painfully cute in some random wedding picture. I? Was the height of fashion for the 5 year old bride. Scan, scan, cut, cut, paste paste. Instant wedding reception gift table decoration…

Me and Patrick...so young and cute!

Close-up for extra cuteness…

More of the cuteness that once was

More wedding nonsense…rehearsal dinner. VERY intoxicated. I am quite certain that night ended with me and Betsy sitting on my bed in my parents’ house at 2 AM talking about her love life and passing a very large bottle of red wine back and forth before eventually spilling it on the floor. I’m also quite certain the stain from the wine is still there…

Rehearsal Dinner

And here’s one you’ve already seen…

Daddy and Girls...again

Apparently, Patrick and I are only photogenic on major holidays. Look! Its our first Christmas. And it looks as though maybe Patrick punched me in the eye as a present. I assure you, he did not. I had probably just rolled out of bed. Possibly? Still drunk…

First Christmas

Christmas AGAIN!

More Christmas.jpg

And AGAIN!

Yet more Christmas

And something else…Easter, maybe? But I am in black. So probably not Easter. Most likely some other tie-wearing holiday…

Some Other Occasion

Patrick again! This time with dog! And in black and white!

Patrick and Belle

And then just when I thought I had collected enough pictures for you I saw this as I was driving to work this morning.

Really, it is chicken

Oh, I’m sorry, you can’t tell what that is? Well then, allow me to zoom in and show you that there was a ROOSTER IN THE ROAD.

More Chicken in the Road

Chicken in the Road

Only in Georgia my friends.

Published by PaintingChef on 26 May 2006

My computer and I will eventually come to blows or I will just pull its hair and run away.

As I was merrily photoshopping (can we consider that an actual verb now? Spellchecker doesn’t recognize it but I would like to enter it into consideration.) along yesterday at work, cropping Patrick the human easel out of photographs of my paintings so that I can actually update my website (well…so that I can burn a disc and send it to Elyse… also found here… to update my website) a great warning flashed up on my computer, a warning that I never thought I’d see.

WARNING! YOU ARE DANGEROUSLY LOW ON HARD DRIVE SPACE! IF YOU DO NOT REMOVE FILES THIS COMPUTER WILL SELF-DESTRUCT IN 2 MINUTES AND END THE WORLD AND MAYBE EVEN STEAL ALL YOUR SHOES! DANGER WILL ROBINSON! DANGER!

Well damn. I tried to ignore it but it kept showing up everywhere I looked. “FINE!” Says I. “I will take my precious pictures of my refrigerator and the mullet family and Patrick in a tree OFF of my work computer! Just please, for the love of all that is good and chocolaty…STEP AWAY FROM THE WEITZMANS AND NOBODY WILL GET HURT!”

I did a little poking around into the subcockles of my hard drive and the mind-boggling labyrinth that is “My Documents” (oh how I long to return to the Mac world where all makes sense…) and discovered that I did, indeed, have more than a few cobwebs to clear. It was then that I kind of wanted to lick Patrick for his foresight to purchase a flash drive that would attach to the memory card for our camera. Because really? Don’t I want to save pictures of my broken finger, cracked windshield, and hair dying adventures for a rainy day?

And all so I could try, yet again, to dazzle you with my artistic prowess by sticking a few pictures of paintings that you’ve already seen at the end of this and calling it “Random Picture Friday”.

Tunnel

Pinks and Blues

Green Cheese Moon

Breaking Out

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